It’s said that sex is a powerful drug. If we were to look at all great men’s quotes on sex we would find this thread of notion running parallel to its euphoric and empowering benefits. The colorful language great men have and continue to use to describe the spectrum of sex is by no mistake. All great men understand one thing: sex is the most powerful of human desires.

Great men see the capacity of sexual desire not as a downfall but as something to be gained from. They turn sexual capacity into creative energy used for solving problems, taking action, and rising above the rest.

Great men do this with pace. They use steady progress towards goals to create distance between themselves and their desires. They know the greater the distance the greater the reward, which further compels the journey.

But modern men do not know pace, and because so they lack self-control. They indulge in all compulsions in favor of immediate gratification. Their journeys are hand-to-pocket as they reach for their smartphones. Or hand to mouth as they indulge in processed foods.

When we live this way we lose our capacity to use sexual desire as an energy source. Without this energy we lose our ability to focus, create, and solve problems in creative ways. We become stressed; then anxious and/or depressed, with the constant nagging that something is missing.

This is not how we should be reacting to stress. A healthy, sexually energized man finds stress to be a motivator.

The greatest signal we need change is when stress stops being a motivator. This is our bodies way of telling us something is wrong, and change is needed. It is often in these situations we feel like we are losing control.

When this happens, we must switch from acting out of compulsion to acting with self-control.

However, self-control is not a quick fix. It takes time to experience its rewards.

In order to keep ourselves from sabotaging the quest, we need to understand that self-control is not self-deprivation.

Sexual Self-control, or Sex Transmutation is:

• Not about depriving yourself of sex, but rather balanced living, by not overindulging in pleasurable things.
• Using pleasurable things as a motivator and reward for doing life's necessary work.
• Doing important things in-between self-imposed rewards like sex, so that we can drive progress in our lives, and make rewards more rewarding.
• About establishing a healthy pace that factors our long term well-being.
• Growing the ability to say no to distracting behaviors so that we can direct our actions in favor of long-term goals and rewards rather than immediate gratifications.
• Not about eliminating the drive for sex, but using one of the most powerful human desires to develop imagination, willpower, courage, persistence, to levels otherwise unseen.

Self-control is an attractive attribute for men to possess because it communicates we are dedicated to a cause greater than ourselves.

Napoleon Hill in Part 2 of his explanation of sex transmutation, brings forward the motivational aspect of having a partner, and credits success to be not purely of the desire for money, but rather to please the woman in the relationship. This illuminates what was said earlier: that a man dedicated to a cause greater than himself succeeds.

By exercising self-control, you learn that sexual energy isn’t something to be gambled away, but rather to be used as rocket-fuel to fly you to the moon and back so you can earn your due reward. It’s the journey we take in-between sex that makes the act more meaningful and fulfilling. And that’s what sex transmutation is about: the stuff we do in-between.

This post was part 3 in the series: Why First World Problems Are Destroying Your Sex Life.

Resources

• Napoleon Hill on ST Part 1 - https://selfdefinition.org/celibacy/quotes/napoleon-hill-sex-transmutation-part-1.htm
• Napoleon Hill on ST Part 2 - https://selfdefinition.org/celibacy/quotes/napoleon-hill-sex-transmutation-part-2.htm